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How Do I Tell Others About My Pregnancy?

Whether your pregnancy was planned or unplanned, it can seem frightening to tell others about it; your parents, friends, family members, or even your significant other. Maybe you’re worried about how they will react or how they will treat you after they find out. The good news is there are ways to make this process easier for everyone.

The first thing to know is that it’s up to you to decide who you tell about your pregnancy. It may be helpful to make a list of people who you’re going to tell. This list can be as short or as long as you want it to be – remember, this is your news to share and you get to be choosy about who knows. Let go of the idea that you need to tell certain people right away – there are no right or wrong ways to do this!

Next, know that it’s okay to be nervous to tell others. This is a natural reaction and it’s important to not ignore it, or think that there is something wrong with feeling this way. Take the list of names you wrote down earlier, and identify how you feel about telling each person, and why you feel this way. It’s also important to write down your own feelings about your pregnancy during this step. How did you feel when you found out? How do you feel about it now?  Knowing exactly how you feel about being pregnant will allow you to figure out how you want to tell others.

After that, take your list of names again and begin to make a plan about telling the people you are going to tell. Where will you tell them? How will you tell them? Who else is going to be there when you tell them?

Some things to keep in mind:

– Make sure the person you’re telling is not at work or busy with other things. This allows them to fully hear what you are saying and not be distracted.

-Don’t avoid the word “pregnant.” Saying the words, “I am pregnant” may seem sudden, but it avoids any confusion about what you are trying to say.

-Allow time for them to process. The word pregnancy can bring on a lot of different thoughts and emotions. Don’t feel like you have to continue talking or fill every silence. Let them sit and think about what you’ve just said. Ask if they would like to call or meet up again after a few days have passed, and after they’ve had time to absorb this news on their own.

-Ask them how they’re feeling. It’s likely you’ve already had time to process your own feelings at this point, and now it’s time for the person you told to do the same. Asking them questions like, “What are you thinking right now?” or “Do you have anything you’d like to say?” will allow them to feel they can share their thoughts.

-Lastly, it’s important to stay positive throughout this process. People may not react how you expect them to. You may think someone is going to have a negative reaction, but they may surprise you with just the opposite. Telling others about your pregnancy doesn’t have to be a bad or scary thing. This is a big step in an exciting journey –  remember to not be too hard on yourself.

If you have any questions or would like to talk about this more, call the Chequamegon Pregnancy Center to schedule an appointment with one of our Pregnancy Decision Coaches. They would love to support you as you have these conversations with important people in your life.